Guilt Complex Explorer Gifts

'Just stop listening to Public Broadcasting, and your guilt complex should clear right up!'

This is Dr. Sadie, what's your question, caller? I just found out my wife got a bonus at work. But instead of buying gifts for my mother and my six brothers, she flew to Maui and sent me a photo of herself eating a seven-course meal. Stop whining. She's given you the best gift a spouse can give ... Something to hold over her head for the rest of your lives. Well ... There is that, I guess.

That feeling when you know the preacher is talking directly to you.

Tell me about it--last night I ate a whole sleeve of Communion wafers.

"I want to have at least two children - I have too much guilt to give for just one."

'I really don't need to go to church, Reverend -- I feel guilty enough without it.'

'It's true that my wife does forgive and forget - the trouble is that she never forgets what she's forgiven...'

Mom's Diner: I do and do and do for you and what thanks do I get? How about your business? Is that too much to ask?

"On your previous visit you were describing how you were unable to express grief at the death of your first dog, Ranger. Please continue."

"We always see a spike after April 15th."

Bad Mom Cards - Collect The Whole Set!

Theories Of Everything: 'Everything would be perfect if I had a dirt bike.'

Introducing...Superegoman!

Will assuage guilt for money.

"Wait a minute. Isn't tonight the water conservation rally?"

Losing a loved one is never easy. The trick is to make it look easy.

"When I think about my mom, it hurts here."

Shrink to criminal - 'At what age did you lose your innocence?'

"You're not even listening, are you?!"

"Do you really need a resource-sucking, ozone-depleting, planet-killing bag?"

'If he starts to pet you excessively whilst she's shouting it usually means he's feeling guilty.'

Martyr Complex

"Oh my God, mother! That is, like, so passive-aggressive!"

Animal cemetary with a grieving dog.

"This is a charity calling. Please stay on the line for the voice of human kindness."

'I just couldn't bear to be without Floyd. So I had him stuffed!'

'Every time I come here, it ends up a guilt trip.'

"You're still with me every day, Mom. Please stop."

'I strive to remember people's names to make them feel guilty about forgetting mine.'

"Whenever I watch the Nature Channel I get survivor's guilt."

"Okay, I feel guilty...you're reading and I'm watching TV."

'Come on - cry, this is meant to be the saddest day of your life.'

"You can see my childhood here."

"Your funeral program. Y'know . . . for whenever."

"Who broke my St. Pius figurine?"