Guilt Trip Enthusiast Gifts

Woman Browses Section Labeled "Guiltmaking"

"When I think about my mom, it hurts here."

Mom's Diner: I do and do and do for you and what thanks do I get? How about your business? Is that too much to ask?

'I'm not motivated by profit, Henderson - I'm motivated by excessive profit.'

This is Dr. Sadie, what's your question, caller? I just found out my wife got a bonus at work. But instead of buying gifts for my mother and my six brothers, she flew to Maui and sent me a photo of herself eating a seven-course meal. Stop whining. She's given you the best gift a spouse can give ... Something to hold over her head for the rest of your lives. Well ... There is that, I guess.

Tell me about it--last night I ate a whole sleeve of Communion wafers.

"I'm a monster."

'I really don't need to go to church, Reverend -- I feel guilty enough without it.'

Rodeos

It was worth a try, but I'm afraid the thrill is still gone, Harold.

"It's my extreme sports camera. I thought it would be cool to show my mom what I do at work."

"Ever since my great fall, I've been searching for that same adrenaline rush."

Emperor penguins attempting to fly.

People hanging on to the horns of the raging bull of 'Business'

"Never mind how I got up here — what happened to Grandma?!"

'If another barman cracks the joke about not serving spirits, I'm leaving ...'

'Why couldn't your father have a normal midlife crisis, buy a convertible, or even have an affair with some young bimbo?'

"In case your chute fails to deploy, just bounce."

"You live very near the edge, don't you"

"I'd like a job filled with adventure where there'd be a good chance of claiming compensation."

Mt. Moriah Church Senior Citizens

"We always see a spike after April 15th."

'Just stop listening to Public Broadcasting, and your guilt complex should clear right up!'

"You know, you're not just cancelling a magazine subscription. You're stabbing print media in the back!"

"And you laughed when I had it installed."

My Gay Son Never Calls

Theories Of Everything: 'Everything would be perfect if I had a dirt bike.'

'Are you ready to experience what no man has ever achieved before?'

'Then there's the thrill of the chase. You'll never get that with soybeans.'

Introducing...Superegoman!

Scuba Skater

'Crisis'

Living on the Wildside 2

'Whatever you do, don't ride the 'Twister'.'

Will assuage guilt for money.