Grocery List Aficionado Gifts

Turns out it's just a shopping list. Milk.

'Do we have any alligator pears?'

"Goodness! These tomatoes look so good!"

''I'm totally committed to simplifying my life. No more shitake jalapeno pesto.'

Witches Checkout.

"The checkout clerk will now testily remind you to press 'ok'."

'And this one is just today's grocery list from my wife.'

'Bananas! Once you've skinned them and removed the bone, there's nothing left.'

Mouse shopping after hours

"Mummy! Can't we go to Tescos like everyone else?"

'Tom's never been good at managing his word count down...which is why I've got a 363 page shopping list!'

"I need one of them and one of them..."

"I know I've matured because I choose to purchase my own candy instead of stealing my children's."

"Why doesn't the budget ax ever fall in the produce department?"

"This banana I bought yesterday, when I peeled it it was empty!"

Do me a favor - don

No, thank you, I brought my own bag.

The Creature of the Black Legume

Woman has man in shopping trolley

"OMG! I've bought wine instead of milk...again!"

"Unexpected Spanish Inquisition in bagging area ..."

"When water turns into ice, which of its physical properties increases?"

"After that, our marriage ripened into a divorce."

'Now let's see...We need fodder...'

9 items or less at the gates of heaven

'I said Mascarpone not Mask A Pony!'

Meats

'Ugh! I think it's past its sell-by date.'

"I always buy toilet paper in bulk. My family shreds through it so quickly."

Trolley Cage.

"We can put a man on the moon, but we can't put a Trader Joe's on Wailea Beach?!"

"OK, I've led you down the aisle. Can we have sex now?"

Snacks, Condiments, Necessary Evils.

God sees his doppelganger in the toiletries aisle.

'Oh that's actually for here, not to go.'