Grindstone Guru Gifts

"You need to take it easier henderson. You're working yourself into the ground"

'Ms. Pembrook, we really don't require you to put your nose to the grindstone ALL the time.'

"How can you be out of wings?"

"Trust me, Lew, if anyone knows where the salmon are jumping, she does!"

"Just another 50 decibels on your grunt and we can start to think about letting you hit a few balls!"

On August 14, 2011 at app. 2:00 p, Derek Winslow made scientific history by converting an item of the animal kingdom into an item of the plant kingdom.

Every barbecue has its winners and losers.

'Just how big of a tailgate party are you expecting to have?'

would you like it with extra botulism and a touch of salmonella?

"And this song goes out there to any girl who might consider sleeping with me."

'Don't order the Super Duper Jumbo Special.'

"I've just barbecued my head again."

Barbecuing Aprons For Today's Guys

'So glad you could make our vegetarian BBQ.'

Jack Finds The Giant Grilling At His Giant Grill

Man cooking a single sausage on a very large barbeque.

"Now, suppose some guy comes at you balanced between two blocks."

"Come and get it!"

Getting through the week.

"I use old Duke to check my steaks. If it feels like Duke's tongue, it's rare, if it feels like his ear, it's medium. . ."

'Has anybody seen the flyswatter?'

"Hickory smoke—that's what gives it that hearty Western flavor."

100k Desert Crawl

'...And you're always complaining about the government's international trade agreements'

'How do you like your steaks? Scorched, burnt or cremated?'

'I know, we'll lead off the presentation with me telling an incredibly long and seemingly pointless anecdote about the time I burned my finger while lighting the back yard grill...'

Writer and his Muse on a cookout.

'Does the hunter I just ate make me look fat?'

Funky Chef 2

'Gary freaked out a bit and went way off the griddle.'

'Nice barbecue, Normy!!'

"Everybody's doing quinoa—at least Kamut still has a nice grainier-than-thou quality."

"When Stan's barbecuing nothings ever 'well done'."

The staple grains tended to look down on the more specialized fare... like quinoa.

"I promise you. One day granite kitchens will be the in thing."