Granite Guru Gifts

"I promise you. One day granite kitchens will be the in thing."

"How can you be out of wings?"

The Vineyard

'Well, now that I know he's the owner's son, yes, he's the best damned wine steward I've ever seen.'

On August 14, 2011 at app. 2:00 p, Derek Winslow made scientific history by converting an item of the animal kingdom into an item of the plant kingdom.

"Just another 50 decibels on your grunt and we can start to think about letting you hit a few balls!"

"Trust me, Lew, if anyone knows where the salmon are jumping, she does!"

Apples for sale

Every barbecue has its winners and losers.

Due to his low center of gravity, Jake is the greatesr broncbuster ever!

Intelligent people laugh too!

"I need to tinkle."

'But what is the universe for?'

'Just how big of a tailgate party are you expecting to have?'

would you like it with extra botulism and a touch of salmonella?

'Don't order the Super Duper Jumbo Special.'

'Plastic corks, then screw caps; when they come out with a flip-n-sip Chateau Petrus I'm hanging up my tastevin.'

Barbecuing Aprons For Today's Guys

"I've just barbecued my head again."

"Can I have another sausage Dad?"

'You wanted to be a wine maker in the worst way, Paul - and you've succeeded.'

Jack Finds The Giant Grilling At His Giant Grill

'Which wine list would you like, Sir - Classics or Plonk?'

'So glad you could make our vegetarian BBQ.'

'Oh Hi!'

Man cooking a single sausage on a very large barbeque.

"Is Pinot Noir where you want to be?"

"Come and get it!"

"In our house the four major food groups are Bordeaux, Merlot, Chardonnay and Champagne."

Newton's Cradle Solar System

Wine Tasting and Wine Guzzling

'So much for your theory that mixing two 50-point-rated wines equals one rated 100.'

"Bonk!"

"Hmmm ... perhaps a pinot noir less spilly?"

Getting through the week.