Grief Comedians Gifts

Mourning break.

"This is my new country song I wrote about my self-driving truck leaving me..."

"Hue More Church Candlelight mass 7:00pm - 8:00pm"

"They're born into captivity, it's all they know."

'I hope you ain't got no tax up here!'

Brian the dog#3 - Brian now realised he was NOT man's best friend.

'I forgot to cancel the milk!'

"Well, we could just tell everyone we have an indoor pool!"

'He wanted to be remembered this way.'

"As always he found a way to duck out of working overtime!"

"I broke off the relationship, then came the endless reminders, the sad letters and emails...It's tough cancelling a subscription."

'Every new neurosurgery intern has to make the joke about the patient having an 'open mind' but then they get over it.'

'He was a shooting star, passing through the firmament. Lighting up our dull lives with his all too brief presence.' 'I think we're at the wrong funeral.'

Priest gives the last rites to an expired metre.

"Well he was there a minute ago!"

'He arranged it himself. Let's face it he really was the skinflint's skinflint...'

No caption. (Mimes carry an invisible casket from a hearse).

"I think it's important to remember that he isn't gone forever. He's still alive. He just played a character on TV who died."

Fisherman Funneral

"He was right about saving that box. It did come in handy."

Headstone in bird cage, "We really loved our budgie.."

Bugs hold a candle-light vigil for fallen comrade while the old man responsible for his death is unrepentant.

O'Leary's Monuments

'I think he would have been pleased to know that I got his entire record breaking bungee jump on video.'

"When Kevin walked into a room, he lit it up."

"Of course we have unlimited data..."

'That is one absorbent nappy.'

'Why is he always hanging around?'

"Pleasant Hill Funeral Home. Free Wi-Fi."

Banana Midlife Crisis

'When you said we were planting a bug, this isn't what I thought you had in mind."

'I'd always hoped that I'd leave this mortal coil surrounded by my beautiful, loving family,,, so can some of you ugly ones move to the back'

'You're sure that's one of the stages of grief?'

'I believe it's a snuff box.'

Recycled humor.