Great Dane Giggles Gifts

'You Know Who got into my closet.'

'I'd say he's 10 percent 'pet' and 90 percent 'Lord and Master of All He Surveys'.'

"OK. . .stain, aspirin, water tablet, B12 vitamin, and whisky."

Beware of the Dog Hair.

A baby playing on a grand piano

A mum trying to dry an excited child

Good, but not Great Danes.

'No, Mrs. Dudley! If there's a bone in a chair, that means it's reserved for Marmaduke!'

Can't read 'SLOW'.

'Why do they call it walking the dog?'

"Can we not fly in a "V"? Victor broke up with me."

At the baby oil factory.

"You've done it, Martin - you've taught him to smile!"

'Where it asks, 'head of household'. . . who is it. . . you or Marmaduke?'

'Don't even think about it. Your food bill is high enough.'

'Nope. He doesn't qualify you for the carpool lane.'

'Blummin' 'eck - a granddad!'

'Sometimes he seems almost human, but he's very good at being a dog.'

'Do you think I over-praised Marmaduke for fetching the paper?'

'I guess I get a good deal. I give him the milk and he burps it over dad's shoulder.'

'He's not happy with the portions in the doggie bag.'

'Marmaduke scared some pigeons in that tree.'

'It says here on your application that you were fired from your receptionist position for refusing to answer phones...well, thanks for applying! Bye now!'

'He's a great dog...a bit of a drooler though.'

'Who wants to be the first to show and tell?'

A real turkey lunch.

'Your credit card is no good here, Marmaduke. We're strictly cash.'

'You can wait.'

'I revel in competition. I have two charities, right now, vying for my $50 donation.'

'Don't worry. I won't leave without you.'

"How can you look into those eyes and make her sleep outside?"

'Why, sure I remember you. Marmaduke and uhh. . .uhhh. . .'

'It's disgusting! He just sits and licks his balls all day.'

'Here we go again. He always senses when we have a vet appointment.'