Grape Juice Aficionados Gifts

"Grape juice that went to graduate school."

Wine Lady

'So where do you think pineapple juice comes from?'

"Umm ... not sure what notes you'll detect on your palate, but it'll get you ripped."

"Is there any way I can un-drink this wine?"

'No, you're not calling at a bad time. I'm a professional wine taster - it's alwasys a good time.'

'Wine, high octane grape juice.'

"Can you recommend a wine that would compliment a divorce?"

Man with wine glass face looks unhappy.

"My wife commissioned a portrait of me."

A giant glass of red wine

An Excellent Nose for Wine.

Wine tasting

"I spent all day looking for this Malbec, not that anybody cares."

Wino Appreciation Group

'Now forget that I'm your boss and the CEO. How does my new product idea, Just the Lees, taste?'

"Soy milk and rice milk are okay but I prefer grape milk.".

'I, Dom Perignon, will now uncork the very first bottle of Champagne. Of course, I'm just guessing this is the right way to do it.'

"Thanks for inventing the god Dionysus. Now the whole country has a reason to drink more wine."

'There's over 500,000 different wines? Bernie, we've got work to do!'

'Okay, you've got a mouthful of minerals, grapefruit, herbs and grass. Is it starting to taste like a sauvignon blanc?'

'I could have had a V-8!'

"To tourists this just looks like a pile of rotten and damaged grapes. But here at Trendy Vineyards, we look at it and see Special Select Reserve."

"This family-owned boutique wine is produced from a single grape."

'Hey, if they can grow in Michigan...'

'Bruce! 'ow many times must I tell 'ya? Only one wave of the bloomin' terroir flag over the fruit!'

Schoolboy with lunch box.

"And would you like a wine stopper?"

"Okay then, what wine do you have if we go up to the four-dollar range?"

'Okay, so we had a rainy spring. If we can't make these grapes into wine, maybe we can sell them as water balloons.'

Wine Lovers

'It's got worse than just the occasional sploosh from a wine box, hasn't it?'

"It's an agreeable little wine."

'Careful! Don't drink this here grape juice they're servin'. I've had three bottles now, and my head's a spinnin'.'

Paradise: Collection of wine