Grape Juice Explorer Gifts

'There's over 500,000 different wines? Bernie, we've got work to do!'

'We have 800 beers on tap. If you want to hear all of them, you'll have to get here earlier, we close in six hours.'

Low-Energy Drinks

"Which wine would you pair with the complimentary bread and butter?"

Countervailing Clichés.

'Wine, high octane grape juice.'

'Coffee must wear you out. They're always sleepy when they drink it.'

'Would you care to see our wine list, water list, soda list, tea list, coffee list, single malt scotch list, or beer list?'

'Are you sure this wine is ten years old?' - 'Yes, I remember opening it ten years ago.'

Wine taster with mineral water

'...and one 'death by chocolate', Sir.'

"My favorite tea: hot daffodil-infused chamomile with a hint of whiskey. Are you serious? Of course I'm serious! I've been dosing myself with small quantities of poisonous daffodil ever since 1931. You have to build up an immunity if you want to survive in the cutthroat world of Scrabble tournaments."

'What's wrong with him?' - 'He drank a glass of water by mistake.'

Complaints Desk

Wine of the Day Club

California Beverages Map

Wino Appreciation Group

'I feel cosmopolitan tonight, Joe - Give me a scotch with an irish Chaser.'

What's your most popular drink? Why do you want to know? Why base your order on what other people are buying? Don't be a follower. Be your own man. If you're unfamiliar with a drink, ask what's in it and decide for yourself whether that sounds good. Or better yet, live a little. Take a risk. Choose a drink you've never had at random and see where it takes you. You only have one life. Don't live it following in the footsteps of other people. That's kind of harsh. No, it's the name of the drink.

"There you go bra. Double flat white and homage to Rothko's Seagram series."

Cafe Momus from La Boheme

"I'd like a fat-free, gluten-free, MSG-free, mini, super-skinny, artisan latte please..."

Wine connoisseur in search of new vintage.(Wine)

'Beer? Wassat then?'

Pat's Bar, Rotgut Tasting 5-7.

Wine: New & Old!!!

"No dear- I said I was going to buy you a big PROPER TEA!"

"And would you like a wine stopper?"

"What wine goes well with £5.52p?"

'The brochure says their wines are distinctive. I think I know why.'

Johnny Appleseed's Dirty Little Secret

"... Wine list? No, we don't have a wine list! Perhaps I can get sir something from the vending machine?"

"One man's dirty water is another man's Earl Grey."

'Hi, I'm Leo. How's the food here?'

'I wonder if we strike wine again!'