Gourmet Prankster Pillows

'Hey, pal... do you have a wine that tastes like beer?'

"Tonight, the part of the sea bass will be played by the chicken."

'Chef's salad as ordered.'

"The recipe said to let the chicken rest after it comes out of the oven!"

Man opens refrigerator which promptly burps.

"The chef ran out of the shiitake-infused sweet potato au gratin, so he substituted hash browns."

Do-it-yourself sushi bar serves live fish to customer.

'Lets all thank Martha for her very innovative 'Hot Dog Crepes'.'

'Well you asked for Al dente.'

"I'm not trying to freak you out, but your eel roll is moving."

"More helium."

"Here's the pub-grub you ordered"

'Thank you for the turkey, thank you for the dressing, and thank you for the squash, which Mother cleverly refers to as pumpkin pie.'

Doughnut Criminals

All you can eat chicken $3.95: "Cooked is 20 dollars extra."

'You don't appreciate anything I cook!'

'Word to the wise: Always check the cheese for pills.'

'The chef's hat was delicious! But the hair...'

Stock Cube Crossing

'I told you rosemary and sage, but don't add the garlic until the last half hour.'

'Coool! What's that called? 'Suicide bomber chicken'?'

'No, I don't have a favorite. Dung is dung.'

Mock Apple Pie Recipe

'No, there isn't any shrimp in the 'Shrimp Surprise' -- It's just called that because it's not all that surprising.'

The mushroom pickers

'Here's one I nicked earlier.'

'Okay, this is the scene where the bear becomes a parachute.'

'... we've got a crowd of, oh I'd say fourteen million organisms here for the annual 'Salmonella potato salad bowl'!'

Fitz wasn't sure if this was a legitimate rescue or just more culinary trickery.

'Nice Touch!'

Peanut Butter and Jam Attack,