Gourmet Hikers T-Shirts

"I keep thinking about last night's salmon en croûte."

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

"You're the lid to my pot."

La Table

'Er . . . and a fork for me...'

"You say your crème needs more Brulée?"

'The heart and eyes feel nothing, but the stomach and ears are completely infatuated.'

"Oh, look- French! Let's try it."

'Wait until you taste the artisanal water. It's not to be believed.'

"...But ASIDE from that, how was your trip to France?"

Every time you make a blend, somewhere, a wine maker dies.

"I read somewhere that truffles are a gateway fungus."

Jeff soon discovered his mistake in ordering the one ton soup.

Gaston's Gourmet Truckstop

"You have a big check because you had a big wine."

"Cancel the trip. The cook didn't get a visa."

'What wine goes with comfort foods?'

'Actually I'm a nerdivore. I only eat your lamer plants and animals: duckbill platypi, cumquats, daffodils, the occasional mudshark.'

I wish I'd had the review.

Holiday Supplies

"You ordered the organic, unprocessed, whole wheat spaghetti?"

"You've ordered comfort food. May I recommend a comfort wine?"

"The prices they charge here, you'd expect them to have an oven not just a gas ring!"

"They won't even try their palate cleansers!"

"It's been redacted to produce our sauces."

"I don’t know, Margaret. She looks like the type who makes exotic stuffings."

"I think foie gras is French for endless buffet."

'You want to eat out tonight? -- What if we get addicted to good food?'

"It's a Haiku Dinner."

"I didn't invent the wheel. I invented the pizza."

"The food here is excellent- what time is breakfast?"

"Don't worry about it now, but I'll need that hook back when you're done."

Platter confusion.

Leftovers restaurant - for that unpretentious dining.

'May I suggest a pleasant viognier to put the subtext into gear?'