Gourmet Food Admirer Gifts

Zagat-rated.

'I sent out for everything.'

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

"You're the lid to my pot."

'The heart and eyes feel nothing, but the stomach and ears are completely infatuated.'

"Waiter, can you heat this up? The wild salmon got cold while I was posting it to Instagram."

"I cook the sausages in French mineral water, I wear a French beret and I can call you 'Monsieur'."

"Keep your glasses on. It will look like twice as much."

'I'm sure M'lady will appreciate the mashed potatoes. Our chef uses only grass-fed single-udder butter.'

'Why, thank you. When they started the vineyard five generations ago, I heard they were shooting for freakin' awesome.'

'You're lucky there, Sir. That's the last one in the world.'

"We'll start with the appetizer, move on to the entree, and then finish up with dessert."

"We'd like the roasted homework for two. And fetch us a bottle of your finest toilet water."

"And exactly how is the peanut-butter-and-jelly prepared?"

Victorian Fast Food - 'I'll have the lark pie festooned with eels, a full stilton, two bottles of port,,,'

'I'm sorry, sir, but it's hats off for the Chef's Special!'

'I'll give you a bite of my calamari for one of your stuffed shrimp.'

"The food here is excellent- what time is breakfast?"

Cheese Pile

Thermidor Dali

"Yes, he is a celebrity chef, but he doesn't have any opinions on Iraq."

Haute Chinese

I told you I got us the best table in the house. Pizza.

"There must be a place we can wait on line for an hour before eating."

"Waiter... my entrée fell over."

"Then again, an honest profile picture would not have got me a wonderful 'Duck Confit with a Chocolat Creme Brulee.'"

Join me for dinner?

'The braised toucan was fine...although I found the bill a little large.'

Man with a 'menu', woman with a 'womenu'.

"When you said, 'Let's go out for dinner,' I thought you meant foraging. This is much better!"

"Sorry about the delay, sir. The manager is interviewing chefs at this very moment."

'Pass the grey stuff.'

Cut out and keep your own Chef

'There was sizzle but no steak.'

'You want to eat out tonight? -- What if we get addicted to good food?'