Gossip Gatherers Gifts

"Yak, yak, yak?"

"Oh, great, there are the Cardwells. Bet you they try to talk to us about their levitating cube."

"And now she's dating a man, of all people."

"It seems unfair to talk about the book when Steve, Rhonda, and Sue aren't here - so let's talk about them!"

'Check this out. By age 50, the average American has consumed enough coffee to keep the entire city of Utica, NY, awake for 10 months.'

'Look at this Henry. You will not believe what they're up to next door.'

News and Magazines. Celebrity gossip. Sports scandals. Political bickering. We're out of the "information age" and well into the "too much information age"!

"I'm voting for Stephen because I cannot stand Katie's mother, she is so catty! Anyway-- how're your parents doing with the divorce?"

"And now here's Cathie with the hypothetical portion of the news."

Annual run-off at the mouth.

'She's so put together!'

"I'm more of a 'How Jen stays thin' person than a 'Why Jen won't let Brad alone' person."

A little bird told me...

'Yak, yak, yak.'

'What's wrong? Think the walls have ears?'

Men gossiping

"Pssst! I had some CGI done."

"...and she said 'MOO!'"

'It's a fake - but all the hanging around the water cooler is down 57%!'

"Can you recommend a wine that would compliment a divorce?"

"I guess when your husband dies you'll really understand what they mean by a statistical death."

'Georgy Porgy kiss 'n' tell story.'

"Or we could raise your profile by coming out with that pimple on the end of your nose."

Every morning the office gossip was cascaded down...

"If you have any gossip, tell me now - she could come back ay second."

'John, I have to get going. Here's my views on politics, sports, and automobiles in case some of the boys come in later.'

"Maps to stars' rehab centers."

"Our next contestant is Mildred and her specialist subject is "Other People's Business""

"The incessant chatter was driving me crackers, so I got him his own twitter account."

The 24-Hour Celebrities Doing Something Stupid Channel.

"So, Tom from accounting—you remember Tom, right? Anyway, Tom yells 'TMI, Gail!' Can you believe he said that?" "Textbook Tom."

"Well, Mr. Goddam Fancy-Pants Small-Town-Expose hot shot! What makes you think we don't all have lusty, kiss-and-tell memoirs boiling away inside us?"

JET (Part I)

"Can you keep a secret?"

'Vanity, thy name is Maple.'