Gospel Sharer Gifts

"Go and spread the Gospel. Hide it in colorful, little eggs for the world to find and be delighted by."

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

"I used to drink to forget. Now, age-related, short-term memory loss takes care of that for me."

Wanna talk about it?

"If we could all turn to page 387, turn off your iPods and repeat after me?"

The worship singer suspects someone doesn't appreciate his talent after finding his mic muted for the 3rd time.

Little Richard

"I feel like my emotional baggage is permanently stuck on the luggage carousel."

'Father, meet Sister Kate, she shimmies like a jelly upon a jelly plate.'

'It helps with reception.'

Walking on Water

"Slow down. This stuff is gold, I’m tellin’ ya! Gold!"

'Normally I don't mind regifting but on occasion you get back the same hideous thing you tried to get rid of.'

'Today's sermon is from St. Matthew, Chapter Five....'

'Amen will do ... You don't need to do the wave.'

"The only spells she does anymore are the Gospels."

Share your blessings - give to Toys for Tots, Salvation Army, Food Shelves.

'Today's sermon is on the Gospel according to old Saint Matt....'

"Why do I bother to evangelize online when no one listens?"

"Go and spread the Gospel. Hide it in colorful, little eggs for the world to find and be delighted by."

Religious man watching religious TV

Revisionist Theology Happy Hour in Galilee with Jesus and Judas

"I'm sorry Gary, but my twelve apostles are enough. We don't also need a mascot."

The Teachings of Jesus: Day 1

'So tell me more about your mother...'

'Talking about Jesus is NOT name-dropping!'

'The pipe organ costs a hundred and ten thousand. Four music stands for Ed's Gospel Quartet, eighty five fifty. Discussion.'

'OK that's ten pieces of silver each, except for Judas...you had the Greek salad and the cheese platter, so you owe thirty pieces of silver.'

'You called for tech support?'

Valentine's Day

'Here's the story of the sermon on the mount.'

"Matthew, Mark, Luke, Peter. John you are out of order again."

Beth Moore

"Sorry... we're a juice bar now."

'Today's sermon is on the Gospel according to old Saint Matt....'