Golf Course Strategist Gifts

"Perhaps we can arrive a a mutually beneficial arrangement?"

"There goes the merger between Brigg's corporation and Ludlow industries!"

'Bobby, I'll need the 12 gauge for this shot.'

STRIP Old Caddy (colour)

"What do you think kid, saw or axe?"

New and improved! BunkerBuster! Get out of the sand trap every single time - or your money back!!

Doctor pulling golf caddy sees patient pulling oxygen caddy.

-Sorry about yesterday, I was ill! -You didn't look ill when I saw you at the races! -You didn't see me after the fifth leg!

'I'm finding the greens a bit slow.'

'Do you have any golf balls that are not attracted to water, sand or trees?'

'I love these senior citizen discounts.'

'You beat me by two...but with your penalties I beat you by 150!'

"I can't tell if Ed is taking a long time to line up his shot... Or if he fell asleep again!"

'The other one, Vince! Grab the other one! He's got a Rolex!'

In case he wore pants that weren't gaudy enough for golf, Len kept some cans of spray paint in his bag.

'On this hole you don't drive, just putt.'

'No, you can't win it. But if you can figure out how to get my wife's car off the lake, I'd appreciate it.'

"Instead of eggs, you're going to look after the lost balls in the water hazards."

Danger! Litigators, retrieve golf balls at your own risk.

'Motion seconded!' (golfers)

'Have you got a sand wedge?'

'Now, Perkins, hit my ball straight down the fairway for about 300 yards.'

"What have you done?"

'I thought we'd get a merger agreement, so I arranged for our accountant teams to be on hand.'

Mole living in golf hole.

'Tell me the truth,Rodney - you've moved the hole haven't you!'

'He's trying to figure out a way to miss this putt so his boss can win the match.'

"There are some folks waiting to play through."

'Drat, another hole-in-one. Pity really - I was looking forward to some putting practice.'

Golfer Hits Frog.

'I told you to turn left - this is a bunker on the golf course!'

Golfers! Do not walk on this fairway! Crawl on your belly like a lizard.

'Oh what's the use? You don't know the course.'

"I arranged a foursome like you asked. Allen, Jack, Gene and Howard are playing at three."

'I am so very frustrated! I know it's hard for you to understand, but you don't know the golf course.'