Gift Appreciator Pillows

"Tell your assistant it's perfect."

Teacher's Day Gifts in Cuba

"As a friend, I pray you rest in peace. As a dog, I really want to dig you up."

Love Birds love dancing together

'As a token of friendship we present to you this sacred albino fawn.' 'We sailed all the way across the Atlantic Ocean, and all you have is light deer?!'

Rent a Room With Hot Water

'I take back everything I said about this sweater you knitted for me.'

And when we came home, the entire anthill was gone... It was awful, Mom - but at least Harry and I still have each other...

-"What has this got to do with communication?" -"It's my invention...the hand smiley."

'Ted, isn't it about time you sorted out your deer-gut?'

"Mom, this is Sarah, the friend I was telling you about."

'My husband, Bill, works at the airport - I still haven't opened my birthday presents from three years ago.'

At home with the leeches: 'No, you can't have a Quorn tartlet - just drink your blood and be quiet!'

"Finally, it's Spring! I missed you! Let's go and play!"

'Hey, scratch my back and I'll scratch your back.'

Sue Perkins

Other than a high chair, what qualifies you to sit in judgment? A lethal gavel.

Viking with bike handlebars on helmet.

'You haven't changed a bit Perkins.'

'Look what my son gave me!'

Post early for Christmas 2010.

I suppose this probably counts as an adverse event.

'You guys are real friends!'

"I sense a change in the weather! So I bought you this..."

"One large with cheese, pepperoni and grass clippings."

"This is not what I meant when I said you should try to live in the present."

'Fantastic bottle bag, Chuck! - and, oh, yeah, thanks for the bottle of whatever wine that is.'

"...so you then developed an addiction to buying toilet rolls. Wasn't that rather expensive?"

"My favorite is also 'let sleeping dogs lie'."

'Free! Bonus! X-Ray Glasses!'

McHappy

'Come on, I did it for you...'

"I heard it and you know it! You were purring when the puppy was playing with you and licking your face!"

"An old man uses a stick grabber to pick up a cigarette."

"...and this is my better half...!"