Germaphobe Joke Lover Gifts

I take it you don't think the one meter rule is safe enough

"That's odd. I visited an antibacterial soap website, and my computer got a virus."

Two people in hazmat suits lie in bed

'Let me guess...it's contagious!'

'Gesundheit.'

Superbug Research Go For It / Got it

'I cause sneezes.' 'I cause fever' 'I cause that 'I don't know- I just don't feel too good' feeling.'

'I hope what I have isn't catching.'

"No Hand Sanitiser"

Wash your hands

"Hey!-This looks like a good place!"

Soap Versus Coronavirus

ABC Vice Company: Employees Must Squash Hands Before Returning to Work

"We're gonna make, Rose! Keep washing your hands!"

A mosquito cleaning the surface of a person's arm before sucking out the blood.

"Maybe a little inconvenient, but not a single case of the flu in the entire office."

'We've got a new DNA database...'

'That stuff kills 98% of household germs, but leaves the remaining 2% limping around enough to maintain your resistance.'

"Aways the victim."

Want to hear a secret? Every time they put a nut in my mouth, I give it a little lick.

'I'm referring you to a specialist who isn't as afraid to die as I am.'

"Hypochondriac's handbook. A little passion project I'm working on;, or, rather, I would be working on."

'I'm afraid you've got a computer virus.'

"Gesundheit!"

Shaking hands will transfer bacteria

"Think it can last 20 seconds this time?"

'No, you haven't missed much. Pretty well everyone called in sick.'

"No, I'm not able to transplant your computer's antivirus software into your body. Try washing your hands more often."

'If I keep bringing diseases home from school, maybe I shouldn't go to school.'

"Ouch!... That hand sanitiser is a bit feisty..."

Wearing radiation suits to clean the toilet

'Quit being a baby- go see doctor Brown, and let him shoot you full of something!'

Caveman bathroom

"Looks like you've got some competition."

"Rex doesn't shake. He's a bit of a germaphobe."