Gavel Gladiator Gifts

Loopholes - "That's our legal department."

'If you wanted me to be cooperative, why did you appoint a lawyer for me?'

'You Honor, my client would like to change his plea to 'pretty please with sugar on it.''

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

'Going...Going...Gone! Sold to the lady with more money than sense.'

"Judgement Day: Division Four"

"Everything's gone up."

'I'd better make a note of your blood group...'

"Objection! Pummelling the witness."

"I know I should have gotten a cart, but I can't give up now."

Justice 4 Ron

'He's not called the 'Hanging About Judge' for nothing.'

'Don't blame the lawyer!'

'We the jury find the defendant very, very, very, guilty.'

"Bye now... it's always nice to see you and little Tommy!"

"I really wanted to get you off but I didn't want to make a mockery of Justice."

'So...worked in 'IT' long?'

"Are you trying to show contempt for this court."

''Not guilty'? -- oh, in denial, are we?'

'Tell the truth: does this affidavit make me look fat?'

'After counsel said, 'You did it', the defendant said, 'Did not', followed by a, 'Did too'. . .'

Musk v Zuckerberg - Rockem Sockem Robots

'He has some unresolved issues.'

Pay Cut for QCs: 'I put it to you that this strikes at the very foundations of justice!'

'I wonder how my husband is managing at the construction site with my gavel.'

'Our new product has increased growth in our legal department.'

Must you be so judgmental?

'I predict they go with an insanity defense.'

"Overruled!"

"Your Honor, all this pretrial publicity has made my client look fat."

"I-800-DOGYLAW"

Judge knocking at 'audits' so that 'CPA's' lose their money

"My husband can carry up to fifty times his body weight: he's great to go shopping with..."

'I realize that hearsay evidence isn't admissible by the court, Your Honor, but you're going to love this!'

"Now tell me your legal problem very slowly, with every detail, no matter how irrelevant. Feel free to digress, babble and, especially, backtrack."