Gate Crasher Gifts

Mr Briggs's Pleasures of Hunting - No. VII

"Well, that's the only song we know, so we can play it another two or three times, or we can cut our losses. Waddya say, Cleveland?"

Cat statues on entrance gate

Sally woke up with a headache. This house didn't look familiar. There was a rug burn on her forehead. Three good reasons to quit drinking.

Language purists bring correctness to a whole new level, forcing a name change for Ireland's most famous band.

'I love rock festivals!'

'If the universe and everything in it is expanding, how come our budget gets shrunk all the time?'

"Miles... I'm going abstract!"

Closed Thursdays.

"He hasn't got much chance with her. She just told me to get lost, and I'm her husband!"

'Ah, it seems that I've completely misjudged the mood of the evening.'

'He's training for a career in law.'

Show house. 'I don't like the house. but your champagne's great.'

Delights of the Chace.

Lady asking a man to Jump over a gate before her

"Security was too tight to try and nick one of those Harry Potter books so we went and crashed Prince William's 21st instead."

"Agreed then-I won't network you if you don't network me."

"Next week si my parent & teacher, principal, guidance counselor, crossing guard, bus driver and lunch lady conference. Is that bad?"

You go ahead - I only chase classic cars.

'You wrecked ANOTHER snowmobile?'

'Will you get me those healthy eating booklets form the hospital? . . . I need something to start the fire to grill these bratwursts.'

"It's great that you both enjoy live music, but who are you and how did you get in our garage?"

'You used foul and offensive language when addressing your computer. Well....we've all done that.'

'They do that every time. I think it's something in the meatballs.'

"Good morning passengers awaiting Flight 3335 to Lisbon. We just want to remind you that if the planes leaves the ground and you're not on it, you'll regret it..."

Dreaming of chasing cars.

"Let's just invade the picnic, stay for five minutes, and leave."

"Would you stop? I'm sure they can tell you're eavesdropping."

Dog Gate Accident

"Awkward..."

'How should I know? Maybe their cat died.'

"I didn't get an office with a window, so I took matters into my own hands."

"Have they started yet or is it my Tinnitus?"

Flight Departures

'My computers down again!'