Gas Technician Gifts

Woman misunderstanding when man asks her what kind of gas meter she has

Gas, water, and electricity being brought to a house through hoses.

'This man says he can cut our heat bill in half.'

'Well, how the heck do you think we breathe fire?'

Jack of all trades

The Computer Bore

"Where's the business end of this thing?"

"I give up. Where's the power button?"

Early cyborg.

Bob invents a device that electrically shocks anyone who calls between 11 p.m. and 7 a.m.

STRIP Hambone: Fix it yourself

The Not-So Smart Meter

Congratulations on your retirement!

"You might be interested in our encounter group for people with transmission problems."

Matryoshka/ Russian Gas Cylinders

'Well, the good news is; You won't need to tax and insure it.'

'It's O.K. Charlie - you can relax. The T.V. repairman said, 'it can be fixed!''

"And this is one of our most poular models..."

High speed cinder block

STRIP Hambone: Early diesel run computer

Electronics: Nooks/Crannies

Battery Lighthouse

'Imagine if it was this simple to upgrade our staff.'

'Warning: Use of oversized apertures or antennas will void warranty,'

'But I don't want to be able to turn on the toaster with the TV remote!'

"Since we installed the video surveillance system we're losing fewer socks."

'So you still can't get a sound engineer then?'

Fixing the TV.

"It's so nice to gather and enjoy a simple home-cooked meal together."

'God?' Earth receives its first transmission from space.

'Okay, the motorized rocking chair could use an emergency off switch.'

'The boss said to get rid of all the pirated software before he returns, which will be in about five to ten years.'

Early Tech Support

'It just dawned on me that every time we make a phone call, it's a robocall.'

"All right, pal, I'm just saying, that's what I'd do if it was my Large Hadron Collider."