Gargoyle Lover Gifts

"Look. You think they're hideous and I think they're hideous, but maybe the bishop doesn't think they're hideous."

"I love you, you big fool."

'Going...Going...Gone! Sold to the lady with more money than sense.'

Gramma's Tators & Gravy...All You Can Eat!

"Don't be a sentimental fool, Harker!"

'I don't want to be a nuisance, you can shoot me if it's more convenient.'

Cosmetic Stone Mason.

"You never know what will catch on!"

'...And it comes with valuable coupons toward your next purchase.'

Medieval sculptor hits thumb while carving a gargoyle.

"Now that's just low-down mean."

"Sometimes Ben does very dumb things. I love that in him."

'Oh Gloria, I love you with all my heart, part of my liver and most of my lower intestine.'

'So, were we entertained tonight, or just bludgeoned into submission?'

Doug finally got a chance to use his karate and he forgot to make the ceremonial bow.'

Finding a Zombie House on Halloween.

Count Alucard's Night-Care Center.

"A modest proposal: Why not arm the Trump administration for their own safety?"

'That's what we evolved from.'

"Happy New Year!"

'Eww, when did this building get that hideous gargoyle?'

"Time to go, guys-It's been real…!"

"You must be a computer geek, because I've never had anyone ask me to accept their 'Terms of Use' before a date."

"Hold it right there buster! Is that a wedding ring I can see?"

"I don't know why I put weight on, I hardly eat enough to keep a sparrow alive."

'Our son might be 'Lord Greystoke' and all now, but he still writes to us when he needs advice...'

'Let's see you reverse this, Switherton!'

'the tire and swinging vine was for the children; the 800 pounds of bananas were when mother visited us last week.'

"Hands up!"

"My business plan? Well, all my friends are addicted, so if I can get access to potatoes and set up a deep fryer, I'll be rich!"

Thank you, Thank you... One quick announcement - The owner of a large orange gourd - Please move your vehicle - You're parked on a loading zone.

'How about a drink?' 'You've got gravy.'

Andy is visited by the Ghost of Thanksgiving Future.