Game Day Aficionado Gifts

"Want to come over Sunday, watch the game, and help me start dreading Monday?"

'His wife is very supportive.'

"If God wanted me to go to church he wouldn't have put football on Sundays."

'Let me guess...you're a knights supporter?'

'Personally, I don't like to play Fetch, but it makes him happy.'

'Will you lot come out! - the new kit's not that bad!'

Political Candidates' Playbook Signals from the sidelines

"He's got great velocity but his trajectory needs work."

"All of a dither as per usual!"

scrabble love

"Are there any here today who feel this union is not in the best interests of baseball?"

"Think of me as the designated sitter."

'Hey, hey, hey!'

'Can't you at least wait until half time?!'

"With the prices they charge these days I can't afford to throw a pie or can off beer at the ref."

'Marm doesn't understand, 'I've got it, I've got it'.'

Playing cards.

'They've made this 3D football really realistic, it even chucks coins at you.'

"Slugger goes yard!!!"

"Try letting the ball come to you."

Various men worshipping a statue of a football

The commentators want to run the officials...

"Thursday-Morning Quarterback"

College game crowd: 'WE WON',,,'and that somehow makes you superior'

'I wonder what he is thinking about...'

"Say hi to your mother for me and tell her I'm happy her bypass turned out O.K

"Easy on the fast balls, will you, kid?"

Baseball.

'If you're proposing, Nigel, get it done before full time!'

'The manager takes the pitcher out of the game'

'The blond guy is a forward and the other guy is a wing.'

"You're the sport on my telly"

Balk? Balk! Balk! Balk! Balk! Balk! Balk! Balk! Balk! Balk! Balk! Balk! Balk!

'I committed the sin of pride. I've been gloating over how our church baseball team waxed yours.'