Galactic Gig Performer Gifts

Double bass in space

'But what is the universe for?'

'...heard the one about the Venusian, the Martian and the Saturnian?'

Alien uses astronaut's visor as TV to watch news.

"Is there someone other than Trump I can speak to? I didn't come all this way to talk to an idiot!"

'Three zillion, five hundred trillion and sixty seven billion light years from Zog and now you tell me you've forgot to cancel the milk!'

"Lighten up! Your charts aren't that bad."

Trying to describe the size of the Big Bang.

'And so thanks to my dad's waistline I now understand the theory of our constantly expanding universe!'

A not-so-happy God, with the Humans, sticking an Eviction Notice to the Earth

"You are here"

'Astronomy I, Astronomy II, Astronomy III'

"Do you think it's a form of greeting?"

Dad Planet: 'Hey you KIDS! I thought i said no ORBITING in the house!'

'I could have sworn I put those moon rocks in my pocket...'

'I want you stop referring to our grant as 'The Big Dipper.''

"Here's a blues number I wrote after hat shopping the other day."

"Are there space-babes?"

Craft Show: Earth & Martianware.

'That book is not available in this solar system, but we can order it for you.'

"I can take you to my yoga instructor, how about that...?"

Alien Painting Moon

Expanding Sun engulfs Planets

"Are you sure they'll be able to read English?"

The Two Pipers: Man playing Flute Pipe.

'Technically, you can't really consider these 'alien visitations'. No offence but this planet is the only dumping station in this corner of the galaxy...'

'Maybe the Universe isn't expanding -- maybe it's just you.'

How's my abducting?