Future Master Chef T-Shirts

Boy baking a cake.

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

Too Many Lawyers Spoil the Broth

'Another neat trick is to cut regular spaghetti into little pieces, and next thing you know you've got yourself a bowl of spaghetti-i-s.'

'As a surprise I thought I'd give the new cookbook a try tonight.'

"Still haven't quite figured out the pressure cooker, huh dad?"

"....And then chuck the whole lot in the dustbin and phone for a take-away."

"Keep in mind, this dish is best served in a restaurant cooked by anyone other than you."

Quartet of chefs.

'Hold on, Pepe!... The score is tied with less than a minute to go - and the losing team gets boiled.'

'It's another cookery programme but It's aimed at children.'

"Dad fixed you a balanced breakfast - the runny eggs are balanced with burnt toast!"

"Lumpy? Of course it's lumpy! Sweetbread soup is meant to be lumpy."

Linda discovers she had just baked the wrong ziti

The simultaneous development of dining and pomposity.

Boys Cooking

'We're going to look pretty stupid if it's not a Michelin star.'

'Step 5. Call the Fire Department.'

Instead of a cap and gown Mike got a hairnet and spatula.

French bread

'This soufle is hard.' - 'No it isn't, your teeth are soft.'

"I want you to be well in life, son...."

Spatula Conductor

'Mom, I followed your time-honored legendary family recipe for Brussels Spout Bake with one exception - I substituted a pizza for the Brussels Sprouts.'

'Too much salt!'

'LOOK RENOLDSON, i've had JUST about enough of your moaning and groaning! IF you can't stand the heat, GET out of the oven!' / A chef scolding his apprentice inside an oven.

'Just call me Delia...'

'I could beat these eggs a lot easier if it weren't for all the shells.'

Cooking Contest. I hear you can make tempura out of anything. Yep -- Anything you can do, I can do battered!

'We were playing Doctor and I was sterilizing the gloves.'

Beth realized she wasn't such a great cook the night she tried to make an apple pie. 'Wow! Now that is good meatloaf!'

Capturing a Cook

Gordon Ramsay

"I can't wait to go home and replace all your sports channels with cooking channels."

"Your husband tells me you're a wonderful cook!"