Future Culinary Star T-Shirts

'In the kitchen of opportunity, using the utensils of education and the ingredients of knowledge, you will produce a feast of achievement and the sweet aroma of success will waft throughout the restaurant of your life.'

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

"I have no idea what, hic, went wrong. I did everything, hic, Mario Batali said."

"You're the lid to my pot."

6 Brothers Falafel

"Rump roast?"

Careful, the plate's probably still hot.

Picking pastries.

As you like it - 'Waiter, chicken with watercress please' 'I'm sorry sir we haven't any chicken left ... but if you wish I bring you a larger portion of watercress...'

Cookbooks

'He's trying to put some magic into my recipes.'

'I started out washing dishes, but when the dishwater tasted better than the soup...'

"Oh boy! Mom made microchip cookies!"

'Waiter...my entrée fell over.'

"I've never heard of it, either, but nothing ventured, nothing gained, I always say!"

Peter Pan, the Utensil that Never Grew Up

"'TSP' stands for 'teaspoon' not 'two solid pounds'!"

"How fresh is the calamari?"

"Is the asparagus farm-raised or wild-caught?"

'As a surprise I thought I'd give the new cookbook a try tonight.'

"Our new automated workers need a little fine tuning, but they're coming along..."

"The soup of the day is pineapple with a hint of rum."

"We have; pulled pork, enticed chicken, persuaded lamb, bullied beef, cajoled Turkey..."

"And how is last week's tilapia tonight?"

Before getting a basketball scholarship, Jack worked at a pancake house.

Frank and Ernie's Diner. We're all out of pressed duck, sir, but I can put the squeeze on some chicken for you.

GMOs: The Next Generation

"Our cook is new, so ge's Googling what goes on a bacon, lettuce and tomato sandwich as we speak."

"These things are delicious. Hard and crunchy on the outside, soft and chewy on the inside!"

Man's cooking explodes.

"Still haven't quite figured out the pressure cooker, huh dad?"

"....And then chuck the whole lot in the dustbin and phone for a take-away."

"Waiter, there's a hare in my salad!"

'Would you care for some fresh pepper? Well too bad, because all we have is these dried up old peppercorns.'