Future Bestselling Authors Gifts

The Quack Quack Diaries: Quack Quack Writes A Novel

I should be a writer when I grow up...

"When I grow up, I'm writing the Great American App."

"I was going to chuck it all and go to Paris but I didn't have enough frequent-flier miles."

'How are the ventriloquist lessons going?'

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

'The C minus was sufficient. I didn't need the advice against hiring a literary agent.'

"I know its hard to believe right now, Lawrence, but some day you'll thank me for asking you to punctuate your sentences correctly."

"I try to write a little bit every day."

'I have a best selling novel on the tip of my tongue...'

Great works I plan to complete during the lockdown.

Do you have to write the 5 paragraph essays to be a rich investment banker? Or rock star? Or famous actress? No. No. And no. Then why learn to write one? So when those jobs don't work out

It was my story. A murder mystery. A who-done-it-and-got-away-with-it-until-he-wrote-about-it.

'As a famous writer, could you do something to help jumpstart my career?'

"I've decided to cut out the middleman and self-publish."

"If you saw a book with the title 'An American Speaks Out,' would you buy it?"

'This scholarship application is great. You must have received an A in creative writing.'

"This is an excellent story, Doris, so far."

I'm writing the Great American novel, one bill at a time.

"Those are the failed attempts at my first novel."

"We don't have to worry about being quiet until we're old enough to read that sign."

No animals were harmed during the writing of this book report....

"What made you start blogging about success?"

'Publshing Books for Dummies.'

Parents start infant on the way to fame.

"You want to be a comedian? You can't be serious!"

'I've had a few short stories published, but I'd really like to write 'the Great American How to Write a Novel.''

'I can't promise you a best seller but I can give you fifteen minutes of fame.'

"A major crime publisher is interested in publishing your homework!"

The novel was printed and in the stores ... any minute now, the world would beat down his door.

On the cusp of winning the Nobel, Bernie gets exposed by his third grade handwriting teacher.

'Be gentle with me, it's my first novel.'

'Of course creative writing is important. You want to write home for money when you go away to college,don't you?'

"Whoops - I Accidentally Pressed 'Elevator Pitch.'"

'He's into Proust as only a child can be.'