Funny Family Moments Pillows

"Look. He's just created his first text output object."

'Are you sure you didn't swallow your cell phone? I keep getting a dial tone.'

"I don't know my address or phone number - Maybe you could Google me."

"Two boys from legal to see you."

'...you'd better get yourself a good lawyer!'

Thanks to Floss-A-Cuffs, parents can be certain that their kids will maintain proper oral hygiene.

"My dad and I are trading important life skills. He's teaching me how to change the oil in the car."

"Dad, what does two and two make?"

"Being a parent is like being in prison. . . except we don't get the hour of exercise."

Kid to pastor: 'Which office is heaven?'

"Have you met my bodyguard?"

Billy strip: comic will make you sick.

'Who says women don't like chase scenes?'

"I'd like my son seated in the first row."

'My wife and I can't have dogs!'

"Pianissimo! Pianissimo!"

Meerkats - A Family Portrait

Chip and Fran Cooper: The Most Embarrassing Parents in the World.

"Next time your virtual fish dies, please don't try flushing your computer down the toilet."

"But if I close the drawer, won't my breathable underwear suffocate?"

'Don't you just love them when they're at that age?'

'Let's hit the road, son! We are Baby Bjorn to be wild!'

"How did my mom know I went to get ice cream after school? She's either placed a tracking device on me, or she's tracking my phone."

Even before we began to order in, my dad was always keen to skip the dishes!

"Get another cab, Dad. This one is creepin' me out."

"Sorry mate, I can't sneak out at night: My mum would definitely catch me..."

"The wife thinks he's at summer camp."

"It's too hot to strive for autonomy."

'I'll bet my Dad's pants are bigger than yours.'

"Here's 15 cents. I assume you'll go into debt one day putting me through college, so this will take some of the guilt off my conscience."

"Dad, tell me about the birds and the bees and safeguards."

'Do you know how hard Daddy had to work to get all those dinosaur brains?'

'I'm looking forward to when he's 5 years old so I can boss him around.'

"Papi! Baldo broke my favorite pencil!"

'If you're planning to move back in here with your mother and me, you'll have to abide by our rules.'