Funny Bone Foodie Gifts

"If I'd wanted a Picasso I'd have gone to an art gallery, wouldn't I?"

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

"Waitress, have you smoked salmon..?"

Skeleton playing fetch.

"So...what are you doing after you graduate?"

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

'I'm looking fo someone who can make me laugh.'

"Waiter, there's a weapon of mass destruction in my soup!"

A Club Sandwitch.

"Yo - I'm way overdone in here!"

'How could you flunk stone shop?'

"So when my dad said I couldn't have a dog..."

"Dear, did something happen at the office?"

"Hurry, stop him!" (Dog running off with bone from man's x-ray).

Evolution Interrupted By Man Fishing

'You're supposed to just lick the cone!'

'I did my research paper on Bart Simpson!'

"I'm the Class Clown fish."

Excess Baggage: Some folks believe that calories consumed during vacation do not count against your diet.

"I hear you've a complaint about the eggs..."

Cut out and keep your own Gardener!

Heimlich maneuver, Gastric bypass surgery, Liver transplant.

'And then as the young rat turned around, he realized he was in the junior high, block one dissection class!'

"She's losing a lot of cream cheese. We're going to have to cut her open."

"... And don't come back until you're ready to get funny."

'House wine?'

"Will you be ordering A La Carte, or heading straight over to the trough?"

"Hi, Honey. For dinner we're having Shis Kabob."

"Oooh... bacon!"

"How do you prepare the chicken?"

"No. I wouldn't 'like to see the cheese menu'. And I don't appreciate the stereotyping!"

'Ha, ha! But seriously folks...'

'Turns out medicine is the best medicine.'

Fetch the Boomerang

"Hey! Waiter! This is a dessert wine!"