Fun-loving Feline Friend Gifts

"Do you know why I stopped you today?"

"There's really not much to obedience school. Just listen up and do what they say."

Caveman's dog with head outside car window.

"And where have you previously moused?"

"I can't wait for vacation - I'm going to go sun myself in a south-facing window."

"Hon, come quick! Mr. Puff has lowered his impenetrable wall of feline indifference, and it probably won't last long!"

Tell me again how aloof and independent cats are.

'Tiddles has left everything to an old folks' home.'

"I hate it when we fight."

' 'Cat in the Window'...chapter 14...'

"Mmmm! Bears hibernate in the winter. Cats can hibernate anytime we want!"

Lifestyles of the hamsters of the rich and famous.

"I know we've had our differences in the past but if you scratch behind my ears I'll show you where the catnip is kept."

'Sometimes, I wonder if Master realizes we are dogs: He always says 'good boy, good boy'...'

The practical psychopath

Should've been routine. That was before the dog called and offered to pay twice as much to have the master put down.

Shelter Cat Nap

I'm beginning to regret buying that Roomba.

Christmas Pets

Great moments in art dogs playing poker, cats playing Pictionary,

'The attendant is very good. I tip him the occasional sparrow.'

"I only scratch up the furniture hoping they'll replace it with something more stylish."

"Cat-astrophic Trifecta" "I pooped in Mona's Jimmy Choo handbag." "I knocked over grampa's ashes." "I buried a Barbie in the litter box."

'You're doing that just to bug me, aren't you?'

Snooze buttons for cat owners

'One final question.. what's your policy on table scraps?'

"Humans are strange."

'Want to freak her out? Stare over her shoulder without blinking for 10 minutes.'

'I don't understand: I lick the plates clean, but Mistress still puts them in the dishwasher afterwards...'

Cat holds sign which says - Will purr for food.

"Such a refreshing day...I've spent 18 hours between napping and comatose."

Sunday P.M. July 15, 1990 in the Watternods' Living Room with the Watternods' Dog and Mr. Wu Lung's Cat from Next Door

'Honestly, now that Tiger is neutered I'm perfectly happy just cuddling.'

Chasebook

"All you're doing is emboldening cats."