Frozen Humorist Pillows

'Listen Carl... maybe the central heating wasn't such a good idea!'

Man looking at a thermometer that has broken due to extreme cold

"Your tires are spinning and you're stuck."

Ooooh! Someone got a carrot job! Someone got a carrot job!

Rude Snowpeople

Shaved Ice

I made snow angels in my good clothes and mom gave me the devil for it!

'It's easy, just wee!'

'I don't get it. They told me to serve merlot at room temperature.'

"I love this time of year."

Weather today.

'I bought winter tyres and it didn't snow.'

"Aw, geez. My nuts are frozen." "T-T-Tell me about it."

Titanic iceberg auction

"Business has picked up since we introduced short term cryogenic stays for the football off season."

"Oh no, Doris. . . not implants!"

"I told you we came back too early...I'm freezing my tail feathers off!"

"Normally, applying heat would be the correct therapy, however..."

"Still getting those hot flashes, Margaret?"

"This heat transfer dance had better work. I'm freezing my tail off!"

'Van Helsing, I've told you that just Holy Water isn't enough to kill count Snowcula! You need HOT Holy Water!'

It's a bit derivative.

Emergency Room: 'Quick! Get some ice on this injury.'

"...heat escapes through your head. Lose the hat and you might make it through April"

'Okay, but for future reference; We never grit the ice in here.'

Eskimo Breaking Wind

The Itchy Back