Winter Humorist Pillows

'Have you considered making your will?'

'You must be the one inquiring about the 'temp' position...'

"For low vitamin D, I'd recommend supplements, not sunshine."

"Can you smell carrots?"

"Carl! No!"

Ice Cold Lemonade - Going out of business sale!

"I told you we came back too early...I'm freezing my tail feathers off!"

'Is that why they call this a 'cold snap'?'

'Snowman is an island.'

"Okay so maybe I had a little work done..."

"Looks like a couple of cold callers..."

A man having difficulty standing up on the icey path

'Salt!... Salt!...'

'I'm waiting for a face-lift.'

The Snowpire

'You're trying to get out of this marriage, aren't you, Ed?'

'Okay, but for future reference; We never grit the ice in here.'

"You guys haven't by any chance seen Grandma's teeth?"

'It's easy, just wee!'

'I bought winter tyres and it didn't snow.'

"Level with me doc, how long have I got left?"

"He's such a brown-noser. He gave the teacher an apple and a carrot."

"Have you been eating curry again?"

"It's not that I can't stand the cold - I just hate the holidays."

"About that walk ... can you hold it until springtime?"

A snowman slipped and died

"Your feet are like ice."

"I just said that his parsnip wasn't orange enough."

"Never mind how it happened. Just get me some hot water!"

"Aw, geez. My nuts are frozen." "T-T-Tell me about it."

The Itchy Back

Melting Snow Trophies

"Don't look down your carrot at them. Driveway snow is still snow."

'Some people use woolly worms to predict harsh winters. So what if I take it a step further?'

Rude Devil Snow Angel