Freezer Humor Fan Pillows

The Penguin Vampire's Awakening

"Little help?"

Well... Tis the season to be jolly!

"Do you feel your eyes have changed any since your last visit?" "No. They seem to be ho, ho, ho, holding their own."

'Oh that's weird! i just had a shiver go down my wallet. My wife must have just bought something.'

"I forgive you, Bumpty."

"No, it's not a growth; It looks more like a bite.''

'He wants to return some shade trees because they stopped working in November.'

'I tell ya Frank, if we find one of these babies big enough, we could live forever!'

"Sorry I'm late. We were delayed when Rudolph caught a drone in his antlers."

'Well, fancy meeting you here.'

The Itchy Back

"Look at you, all gnarly and naked and gross!"

'Didn't I tell you I could find carrots even in winter?'

How to Tell Spring is Here.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't realize the water balloons had already frozen..."

"What was she thinking?!?"

'Maybe I shouldn't put 'instant cooling' on maximum.'

"Oi! You little fucker!"

"Mmm. The soup du jour is not cream of mushroom. It is not tomato or celery, it is not chicken, nor is it Scotch broth. It is most definitely not won ton..."

'Welcome to our world standy uppy slippy world you swimmy jerk!'

'I didn't know I had to bring a rifle. I'm sort of new at this. Last time I went hunting it was for Easter eggs.'

'We should have bought the piano first, and built the igloo around it.'

"Ooh...this looks like fun. I could do with a good giggle!"

"I want to cancel my 3 o'clock and my 4 o'clock, and oh! I want to cancel my 1:30!"

Gesundheit! - a christmas tree should be fresh.

"Well look who decided to show up."

"Harold, you fool, what were you thinking?!"

Snowman half melted, computer lies on the floor. Other snowman says: 'I warned you about using that laptop.'

"I know I made fun of you for using a box, but it's cold out. It makes sense now, so can I use it?"

Putting the pets out.

Sabre Claws had his very own take on season's greetings...

"I want a Bark-O-Lounger."

'Of course I look cool! Eskimos always do.'