Forest Funny Bone Gifts

'It's going to be hard to get lost in these woods!'

Snowprov

'How could you flunk stone shop?'

"Dear, did something happen at the office?"

An early space launch attempt.

"So when my dad said I couldn't have a dog..."

"Hurry, stop him!" (Dog running off with bone from man's x-ray).

"I'm the Class Clown fish."

'I did my research paper on Bart Simpson!'

Excess Baggage: Some folks believe that calories consumed during vacation do not count against your diet.

'And then as the young rat turned around, he realized he was in the junior high, block one dissection class!'

Cut out and keep your own Gardener!

"She's losing a lot of cream cheese. We're going to have to cut her open."

'Is it okay to apologize for something I'm going to do?'

"How do you prepare the chicken?"

You thought YOU hated YOUR job?

'Ha, ha! But seriously folks...'

"I just wish that, for once, when he asked me what I wanted, it wasn't followed by 'for Christmas?'"

'Well Alice. Now do you know what cull means?'

'Bugger it, we're out of beer!'

"This is Siri. No, you're not there yet!"

Movers and shakers.

"Something that makes me look unfit for human consumption."

Dog at a restaurant

That's the worst case of 'cow arse' I've seen in a child!

"I can hear Jingle Bells!"

"Care to support the caterers courtesy campaign?" "Do you mind I'm trying to eat!"

'No, there isn't any shrimp in the 'Shrimp Surprise' -- It's just called that because it's not all that surprising.'

'I'm afraid it's mad cow disease.'

Dave soon realised it was going to be a tough gig.

'Can't understand all this fuss over cattle growth hormones.'

Birthdays were always better at Mom's.

"Sadly, we're seeing more and more of this as we encroach on their natural habitat."

"Get names!"