Forest Frolicker Gifts

Bear Butt Target

'I love doing things with you, Dad but couldn't you just coach my soccer team?'

'Y'know, this wouldn't keep happening if you learned to load your pack properly.'

Turned out to be a not-so-lucky bottle cap.

'That's one hell of a mating call you've got there, Bob!'

'Never go berry pickin' on an empty stomach.'

"I'm going to introduce you to the wonderful world of trees."

"Look! A menu!"

'Bird Watching is fun, but it tends to make me salivate...'

Erratum: The caption for Fig.35 shoudl read SHAGGY MIDNIGHT DEATHCAP not CHICKEN-OF-THE-WOODS.

'I'm getting tired, Robin. Why don't we teach the poor to steal for themselves?'

'He's playing cards with the wild animals. Just how long have you guys been out here camping?'

"Nature lover my tailfeathers...I say he's a peeping Tom!"

"Yes Sir, we have secret storage locations all over the forest, so we can safely manage your favourite bone and toy..."

"Well, it might not work but at least it smells bad."

Black Truffles!

'Not sure when I'll be home -w we're on another wild goose chase.'

'There's no inflammation of the wood pole. . . but he does appear to suffer from hardening of the chain saw.'

'You sure complain a lot for someone who says he loves nature.'

"Robin Hood himself is OK, but I wish his Merry Men would just be quiet and let us sleep at night!"

Maybe next hunting season Phil will succeed in bagging, not just boxing, a moose.

"You are aware that’s a golf ball?"

"You were right. This is way more fun than killing you."

"Nature has a twisted sense of humor."

"Here, try this anti-dandruff fertiliser my gardener recommended."

"Do you hear dueling tubas?"

"Honey, don't engage."

"Let's have a look at that Appalachian trail map again."

"I always feel sorry for the kids who have birthdays during hibernation."

Wild Window Washers

"The woods are out for black masses. They're always full of teddy bears having picnics!"

'I swear, if he recites 'Trees' once more, I'm going to drop all my chestnuts on him!'

'What makes you think I fell asleep?'

'Better go easy on those acorns, Fred. You know how they give you gas.'

Hunter about to fall into a trap set by deer.