Football Fervor Dreamer Gifts

Midnight in Minnesota

Football Fans

"Let's go watch TV I hear there are bowl games on."

"England losing from a penalty shootout again!"

"Do you do temporary ones that last about two weeks?"

If nobody had invented graphics

'Frank built it himself. The last football will fall through the hourglass 10 seconds before the Super Bowl starts.'

'Originally he was the mascot until we discovered he had a golden foot.'

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

'Yes, Jenny, I know I'm always reminding the team to be good sports, but you really don't have to thank the ref after every call.'

'Now that's the Group of Death.'

Raheem Sterling

Football

"I'm not using my jumper as a goalpost, sir, I'm using it as a jumper."

'At least now the injury worries are over, we can concentrate on slagging off the team.'

'He's got abdominal pain, dizziness and soreness in his extremities. I'll know more when I see X-rays...'

Big screen TV.

'Let's throw ball. Running game not working.'

'And at what stage did you realise the ball you were heading was on the TV?'

"Next time you score show a little respect and don't spike uncle Frank so hard."

Sport: Crisis in the Real Madrid.

Kenny Dalglish

This is a great game --- All except for that blimp. It keeps reminding me I've already broken my diet resolution. Pizza. Chips.

'I told him if he didn't get here quick he'd miss out on all the beer and food.'

"All of a dither as per usual!"

"This crucial pre-game drill keeps you focused and eliminates distractions!"

'Oi, nobody gives me a kiss.'

'I've never seen so many strikers in one team before.'

'And now on the comedy channel Jose Mourinho's latest outburst.'

Beer Order

Football Crazy strip six

'My ultimate goal is to do product promo in a popular Super Bowl T.V ad.'

'I got a reverse hat trick. I let three goals in.'

Supermarket - World Cup Specials