Football Dreamers Gifts

'Yes! How does if feel to be giving birth to a future kicker in professional football?'

Football Fans

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

'This goes way beyond just keeping the flies off me...I'm fighting crime now too!'

Midnight Basketball

'Dad, are you sure this is building the right muscles for football?'

Baseball Dreams

'He's soccer mad! Ever since he did his first sums he's wanted to be a players' agent.'

'It's great that you want a career in football, Timothy, but don't you think being a striker would be more fun than being a goalpost.'

Not The Real Me

'I want to be a professional Polo player too when I grow up...Can I have your autograph please?'

Footballer Dreaming of the Football as Sack of Money

You guys aren't living up to your preseason hype!

"I wonder if there will be unintelligent life on Earth?"

Penalty

"You want England to win what!? Put me back in the lamp!"

'Boy, I love pretending to be Jens Lehmann...Now I can go home to watch football on TV!'

'There was a time when I considered making myself available for the NBA draft. But one day I realized, hey - I'm a slug! I don't have an athletic bone in my body!'

Wordplay: Mind Games.

'When do I learn to read and sign a huge NFL contract?'

'Son, there's more to life than dunking, There's also making big money from ads, like Yao Ming'

'Your grandfather is a cautionary tale, son. He quit school early and pinned all his hopes on an NFL career. But in the end, he was never used in a single game.'

'It's OK if you want to live your sports dreams vicariously through your son, Mr. Wagner. But you'll have to do it from the bleachers.'

'Save some purrs for when I play quarterback for the Saints.'

How to think and act like a professional cricketer.

"Sure, we know how to have a good time up here"

NBA Vampire

'I wanna be a hockey goalkeeper.'

"There's an uncertain feeling in the air..."

Jack Russell fails to make the cut for a basketball team.

Midnight in Minnesota

"Married a local musician"

"It keeps us fit at a safe social distance."

STRIP *The Fan * "Let Garry McAllister be you inspiration."

"I dreamed the Yankees lost in Game Seven."