Sports Dreamer Gifts

'...but if you never put me in the game coach, how will my father ever live his own sports dreams vicariously through me?'

'It's OK if you want to live your sports dreams vicariously through your son, Mr. Wagner. But you'll have to do it from the bleachers.'

'I'm going to try to be a pro hockey player. So, if I don't return, you'll know I made it, and you can take charge of the marketing department.'

'I want to be a professional Polo player too when I grow up...Can I have your autograph please?'

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

"My ultimate sports fantasy is to see a star player request a baseball autographed by the umpire crew."

Midnight Basketball

"... Now playing center field for the Yankees... Peter the Great!..."

"You want England to win what!? Put me back in the lamp!"

Sporting dreams

'There was a time when I considered making myself available for the NBA draft. But one day I realized, hey - I'm a slug! I don't have an athletic bone in my body!'

Wordplay: Mind Games.

'When do I learn to read and sign a huge NFL contract?'

Too small to play forward. Too slow to play guard.

Not The Real Me

Baseball Dreams

"Success came too early. When he was ten, he hit three homers in three times up in the Little League, and nothing has seemed worth while since."

"I dreamed the Yankees lost in Game Seven."

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

Football Fans

'They were hoping to gradually introduce him to the pro game, but injuries left them no choice.'

"Mom, Mom, watch me!"

"I'm less a role model than a cautionary tale."

'Yeah, I know your idea of heaven is to play golf all day, but all we have is shuffleboard!'

Enjoying a picnic at the rugby ground

Olympic Climate

"I'm running away to join the W.N.B.A."

'He followed me home, Mom. Can I sign him to a five-year, $80-million contract?..'

'Dad, are you sure this is building the right muscles for football?'

'This game is going to be a character-building experience.'

'He's got a good attitude, and he's tall. But he's got to get into the weight room.'

"Behind the back, between the legs, around my disappointed parents, nothing but net."

'If he starts early enough, he could be the next Rory Mcilroy.'

'He's soccer mad! Ever since he did his first sums he's wanted to be a players' agent.'

"This is their way of reminding us how we're losing our best hope for Olympic Gold."