Soccer Dreamer Gifts

STRIP *The Fan * "Let Garry McAllister be you inspiration."

'Boy, I love pretending to be Jens Lehmann...Now I can go home to watch football on TV!'

'My Dad said I'll be an international goalkeeper when I grow up!'

'It's great that you want a career in football, Timothy, but don't you think being a striker would be more fun than being a goalpost.'

'He's soccer mad! Ever since he did his first sums he's wanted to be a players' agent.'

'But you said if I came over we could play Fantasy Football!'

"I could do that!"

Football Fans

'Desert island cartoons - and you?'

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

Midnight Basketball

Baseball Dreams

'Dad, are you sure this is building the right muscles for football?'

Not The Real Me

'I want to be a professional Polo player too when I grow up...Can I have your autograph please?'

Penalty

Footballer Dreaming of the Football as Sack of Money

'Yes! How does if feel to be giving birth to a future kicker in professional football?'

"You want England to win what!? Put me back in the lamp!"

"Why are you studying? Go outside and practice shooting three pointers, so you can ear big bucks like Steph Curry."

'There was a time when I considered making myself available for the NBA draft. But one day I realized, hey - I'm a slug! I don't have an athletic bone in my body!'

Wordplay: Mind Games.

'When do I learn to read and sign a huge NFL contract?'

'Your grandfather is a cautionary tale, son. He quit school early and pinned all his hopes on an NFL career. But in the end, he was never used in a single game.'

'It's OK if you want to live your sports dreams vicariously through your son, Mr. Wagner. But you'll have to do it from the bleachers.'

NBA Vampire

How to think and act like a professional cricketer.

'I wanna be a hockey goalkeeper.'

Midnight in Minnesota

'I can tell you the meaning of life or I can tell you when the Leafs will win the Stanley Cup...choose wisely.'

I worry that your camp concentrates too much on soccer. I'm ok, mom. Really. Specializing is bad for your joints and muscles. Chill, mom. I'm cross-training. Oh. I have very well-conditioned thumbs.

One man's food coma is another man's imaginary game-wining catch.

"I dreamed the Yankees lost in Game Seven."

'I'm going to try to be a pro hockey player. So, if I don't return, you'll know I made it, and you can take charge of the marketing department.'

Too small to play forward. Too slow to play guard.