Foodie Facing Restrictions Gifts

'You can eat, but you must never again drink and be merry.'

Things to do while you're stuck at home during the coronavirus crisis.

Stay at home food pyramid

"Do you want brownies or cookies or banana bread or apple pie or peanut brittle or chocolate muffins or carrot cake?"

"I'm taking you off two of the four food groups."

'Do you have a traditional Christmas dinner, but for a lacto-vegan fruitarian?'

'You have to lose weight. Stop having intimate dinners for two, when you are not expecting anyone to join you.'

"Dinner looks delicious."

All You Can Eat Buffet: "Remember, my safe word is 'Diabetes.'"

"I was the first one to work completely gluten free."

"Thanks for the starter!"

"Dear Mum, please stop sending me food parcels..."

"Did you notice the smirk on his face when he said 'enjoy'?"

"Back inside, Bernie! The buffet is full of shrimp, pork and ham!"

'He asked me if I wanted to put anything on my burger, so I had a tenner each way.'

"I'm not quite ready to order. My lawyers are still studying the menu."

"The Attorney's Lunch—may I hear the warranty again?"

'Oh I can't stay here, i'm allergic to shell fish.'

'Grate two hundred grammes of cheddar cheese...' - 'Uh-oh.' - 'Oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no...' - 'Cheese gives me nightmares.' - 'Argh!!! No!!! Make it stop!! I can't take the pain!! No!! Arghhhh!!!'

Quisine: Exciting New Dishes Inspired By Whatever's Left On Your Shelf

"I used to be a foodie. Now I'm a fussy glutton."

"Fred? Can you help me? I'm really in a jam."

"I never thought I'd be saying this, but I'd like some hospital food."

The Sprats

"Made a king-sized portion of my Nana's famous cheese ball with toast points..."

So su me.

'Please be careful, sir, the plate is hot.'

'Do you have another menu of what I can have?'

"I asked for something gluten-free, dairy-free and meat-free and he brought me a glass of water."

Skeleton staff. No food to be consumed on these premises.

"Judge Edelman is taking the chicken livers under advisement, Gertrude; I've decided in favor of the veal; and Judge Hefferman seems to be recusing himself."

'I don't think it's so much my inability to lose weight as it is my ability to find it.'

"Sorry, dear. I couldn't find a gluten or lactose-free sugarless non-GMO raw-vegan birthday cake..." "Tell me that's a nutless mulch muffin."

'As your weight-loss counselor, I must advise you to stop thinking of eating as a hobby.'

'Then you admit you went into the Mexican Restaurant and said to the waitress, 'Baby, I'd like to nibble on your tacos'.'