Food Jokes Pillows

Baby Cheeses.

Sorry, had skunk for lunch.

'EEEK! There's an apple around my worm!'

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

"States of tofu"

Bangers and Mash

'Nowadays we want all our food to be ethically sourced, Personally I'd be happy if it was all chocolated sauced,'

MUSHROOM MASACRE.

Filet minion

How to Deal With Leftover Turkey

'Muriel's philosophy is that what happens in the kitchen, stays in the kitchen.'

"Charles didn't like tofu."

"My guess it's guacamole."

"Dare I ask for mustard?"

Deliboys

"The Knuckle Sandwich is good."

"Dad fixed you a balanced breakfast - the runny eggs are balanced with burnt toast!"

Sisyphus Sawyer

"I'll have the vegetable lasagne, hold the vegetables."

'Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!' 'That's not soup! It's gumbo.'

'Well you asked for Al dente.'

"It's choux pastry, not shoe pastry!"

"And your baskets include dead crickets, old socks, mice guts and toilet water."

"The chef made some substitutions to tonight's menu. Instead of Escarots a la Bourguignonne, he's cooking hot dogs."

'YAY! PATE!'

"We only do salads. There's no need to keep warning customers that the plates are cold."

'Oh boy, my favourite: Cheese Fondue...'

'It's beans OR toast, not beans ON toast.'

"Man does not live by chips alone. There's also guacamole."

"That's just great! Enough with the public displays of affection!"

Stay at home food pyramid

'I made your favorite -- dinosaurkraut!'

'I thought a perfect martini would cover the 'well balanced' requirement of my night to cook.'

"Hallelujah!"