Food Hygiene Humorist Pillows

Chef copy robot

"Our Summer Citrus IPA contains your full daily requirement of fruit and fiber."

"War is hell and so is this soup."

Lesser known greek gods,

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

"I feel like we are the polyester of dairy products."

Then get under cover before you are struck by lightning.

The British Territory of the South Sandwich Islands.

'Take of the fruit and eat . . . Well, peanuts actually.'

'I think I'll go home and eat'

Dolphin friendly tuna

'Lining my pockets with aluminum foil so I can sneak Thanksgiving leftovers home.'

Garlic Free Zone.

"I'll have the spaghetti, does that come on toast?"

I'm freshwater. Make it a margarita without salt.

'I think it's more than a coincidence that I discover fire, and my wife discovers burnt food on the same day.'

'Yes, I am impressed at how fast you got here, but where's my pizza?'

"Can you turn these mashed potatoes into french fries?"

"The salad should be delicious. We ordered it with lots of extra bacon bits."

"Waiter, there's a hare in my salad!"

"Ohhh...pick me pick me!!"

'Barb had her stomach replaced with a mouse's stomach to help her eat less.'

"The prices they charge here, you'd expect them to have an oven not just a gas ring!"

'I take it that the birthday cake is for this old trout you just served me?'

"Why can't you just learn to floss like other men?"

Cat eats date.

"I'm just the bus boy but I'll be ignoring you also."

'Look, I know it's artificial orange, but you're sick, I say, sick.'

'Mustard, ketchup and mayo are all nice and creamy smooth. Why isn't anything being done about relish?'

'We just invented cooking yesterday, and already she's serving leftovers!'

"May I offer you a side of life insurance?"

"If we crunch the numbers, it should have zero calories."

F&E Diner. I'll bet you want the alphabet soup, right? Hey! Don't put words in my mouth!

Cupcake jumps out of cake.

"I don't know where to begin, each dish has its own app."