Personal Hygiene Humorist Pillows

'Your hospital bill is $8437.00, plus $350.00 for not wearing clean underwear when you were brought in.'

'You want to borrow a tampon?!'

Then get under cover before you are struck by lightning.

"Why can't you just learn to floss like other men?"

Chef copy robot

A mosquito cleaning the surface of a person's arm before sucking out the blood.

ABC Vice Company: Employees Must Squash Hands Before Returning to Work

Restaurant menu board: 'Day old - 2 day old - 3 day old'

"Go back! The place is full of mold!"

Team medic spraying deodorant

"Ooh, you’ve got a little piece of retiree caught in your teeth."

'He's so hip he even used rock 'n roll-on deodorant.'

'I missed my roommate so I went out and got this spray called, 'Never Showers,' and now it's like she never left.'

'OK, here are the rules: We can't be seen by humans and can't leave droppings around, otherwise, they'll close the restaurant...'

'If they don't want me drinking out of the toilet, what's this roll of napkins for?'

"I'll take your word for it. You don't have to show me your used floss."

Customers must wash hands after using their laptops.

"Whoever pulls it out becomes King of Britain, but Phil licked the handle, so..."

Ward Cleaning.

"I love you, Ethan, bit I floss alone."

'After this my bath water will never seem the same!'

'What did you find in your soup?'

"I like making pastry... It gets your hands clean."

"Don't drink that, it's hand santizer."

Bath tube with human feet.

A vampire lays in his coffin and he has put his vampire dentures in a glass beside the coffin.

Remember to wash your hands: "...but not compulsively."

'There's an inspector here from the Board of Health who would like to see the chicken soup.'

Jeff woke up with a disgusting film on his teeth.

Graduate.

'This is one thing you can't blame on me.'

'MERCY!!'

"Hello Bob, I haven't seen you since you had a water meter fitted!"

Outside, my mom makes we wear all this if there's a drop of rain. Inside, she's always bugging me to take a bath!