Humorous Hygiene Pillows

'...Sars virus? - no, he just stinks.'

Then get under cover before you are struck by lightning.

"Ohhh...pick me pick me!!"

'I don't understand: I lick the plates clean, but Mistress still puts them in the dishwasher afterwards...'

"Why can't you just learn to floss like other men?"

Missing my hair.

ABC Vice Company: Employees Must Squash Hands Before Returning to Work

Restaurant menu board: 'Day old - 2 day old - 3 day old'

A mosquito cleaning the surface of a person's arm before sucking out the blood.

"Go back! The place is full of mold!"

Team medic spraying deodorant

'He's so hip he even used rock 'n roll-on deodorant.'

"Ooh, you’ve got a little piece of retiree caught in your teeth."

'I missed my roommate so I went out and got this spray called, 'Never Showers,' and now it's like she never left.'

'OK, here are the rules: We can't be seen by humans and can't leave droppings around, otherwise, they'll close the restaurant...'

"I'll take your word for it. You don't have to show me your used floss."

'If they don't want me drinking out of the toilet, what's this roll of napkins for?'

'Excuse me - there's a fly in my soup!'

Customers must wash hands after using their laptops.

"Whoever pulls it out becomes King of Britain, but Phil licked the handle, so..."

"I love you, Ethan, bit I floss alone."

Ward Cleaning.

'What did you find in your soup?'

Employees must wash hands of all responsibility.

Bath tube with human feet.

"I like making pastry... It gets your hands clean."

Happy Hour legal loopholes!

A vampire lays in his coffin and he has put his vampire dentures in a glass beside the coffin.

Remember to wash your hands: "...but not compulsively."

"Don't drink that, it's hand santizer."

Now sanitize the lamp and yell your wishes.

'There's an inspector here from the Board of Health who would like to see the chicken soup.'

Jeff woke up with a disgusting film on his teeth.

Graduate.

'Ey-up, here comes the boss!'