Folding Guru Gifts

"Show us again that crazy way you fold a newspaper to read on the subway!"

The Department of Blind-Side Bias, Knowledge Gaps and Really Great Coffee.

"Why won't you teach us how to handle complaints?"

CLOTHES-HORSES OF THE ART SCENE

Handbag store - "Perfect."

'We live in difficult times. These underwear don't help one bit.'

'She's so put together!'

"Today we'll be performing some much needed maintenance on Miss Trimbles weak pelvic floor."

"Most of these pelts were suicides."

'Good news - basic black is being shown this season.'

A women in a shoeshop.

'You know you're getting old when you take longer to recover than to get tired.'

"The derby is better. That makes you look like Abraham Lincoln."

Yoga Xmas Decorations

Keeping warm.

"Ikea for hippies" 1. Flimsig used pallets, old foam 2. Stinkum goat wool 3. Beetup recycled lumber 4. Riskig kerosene lamp 5. Stupor hand blown by Nils 6. Smokum found on beach in Mendocino 7. Woblig 100% driftwood

"I feel like we've walked into some sort of epidemic of hipatitus."

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

"And now. . . which shoes?"

Four Common Lampshade Mistakes and How To Avoid Them.

"Absolutely not!"

"You look great. One problem though: I'm the one who goes to work."

'This is our bestselling power tie. Just put it on and clap twice.'

At the suit makers

'Do you like my little black number?'

Mr Metrosexual.

Institute of Health next to Alternative medicine dept

"Diamonds are so three billion years ago..."

'Trust me, it's very proper to mix stripes.'

'I can't move in, Ted - your lifestyle is too modern. And your furniture is way too modern.'

"That shirt is so last year."

'She thinks it makes her look enigmatic.'

His and Her wardrobe's

"Amazing! It's the season of me!"