Fashion Guru Gifts

'Does this outfit make me look fat?'

There's a right way to do things,--And a wrong way,

'Must be the Geordie polar expedition team.'

". . .Before I decide, let me get some social validation."

'No! I do not like your new outfit!'

"You wear too many clothes."

Golfer trying to choose which pair of sunglasses to wear.

"I used to hate my body. Now, instead, I hate the forces that conspire to make me hate my body."

Stop now and get some new ideas.

"What I actually said was that wearing jeans with turn ups was the in look this year."

'Sorry, babes, but I need to hang up. My mobile's just become unfashionable.'

"But without expensive brand logos all over your clothing, you're just another indiscriminate consumer!"

'All I know is, it's a babe magnet...when women see a guy wearing one of these things, they naturally think he's caring and sensitive, so it reels them in!'

'Andy, why are you here on your day off?'

Lady Dog walker's t-shirt reads 'Custom Made' and man's reads 'As Is'.

'Are your cowhide coats any good?' - 'They held the cows together, didn't they?'

'I don't like it. The lapels are too narrow.'

'I'm watching a fashion show...it's the 'I'll never be skinny enough to wear these' collection.'

Native American Fashion

'No no no - that skirt is soooo half past four...'

'Finally. Her lipstick is just right.'

Gel!

'Dude, you like, need to get your wallet chain in check!'

Office Formal.

Hip on the outside, dork on the inside...

'This sure looks like the inside of my wife's purse.'

'Would I look good in this?'

Fringes

On the Hanger

Fashionably late for a meeting.

How men accessorize

"We have every visible wavelength in stock. What color would you like to filter out?"

The Barber in my Neighborhood

"I know it's considered a crime against fashion to wear a tracksuit in public, but I'm a wannabe rapper."

"That's the problem with buying shoes online, you can't try them on first."