Cleaning Guru Gifts

'I wondered when you were going to clean the refrigerator.'

'You missed a spot.'

Two cleaners face-off on a checked floor - "Check!"

Heavy-duty, super-capacity, two speeds, 10 cycles. All of them vicious.

'Why not Google it?'

Don't worry Sir, I'll have these pipes unblocked in a second...

'Oh, great. Leonard's got quarterback on his jersey. No amount of bleach is going to get THAT out.'

"That's what I use to clean my keyboard. I have one of the bigger ones on the market."

Cleaning the Decks

Domina-Trickster

"But, Dear. I am doing Spring cleaning!"

Washing machine

Pouring white wine onto a red wine stain will make it disappear. Too bad it doesn't happen to anything else.'

'I love having my own water treatment center.'

Cleaning lady picking up weights

Witch on a vacuum cleaner.

'Out, damned spot.'

The vaccum salesman.

"Namaste."

'I told you to not use my war bonnet for dusting.'

Cleaner wringing out money from her mop.

'Oh great, who do you think's gonna have to clean that up.'

'Then gently rub in the lighter fluid, and the tar will come right out!'

I'm organizing the house. Can I help? Do you have any storage bins for stuff we don't use very often? Hold on. I have just the thing! Thanks, mom.

Nobody takes care of the carpeting here so I have to. You're filling a vacuum!

I decided to put his fear of the vacuum to good use.

"In my house, 'dirty dancing' means it's time to mop the floor."

Sounds that various toys make when they are vacuumed up.

Sweep the board.

The dumpster code - find something, leave something.

"I just cleaned that glass! How can it already be covered in nose prints?!"

'Your house is spotless, your children are well behaved and dinner was delicious. How do you do it?'

Axle greaseMarine greaseElbow grease .

"Next time don't use a herbed vinegar."

'It comes with three settings. Single, Married, and Children.'