Flossing Fanatic Gifts

"I'm not actually doing anything-this is just punishment for not flossing."

The Nine Circles of Heaven

Acme Party Floss

"They're free Valentine's Day gifts...chocolate flavored dental floss."

Floss Street Vendor

'Yes I floss regularly. Once every 6 months when I come here!'

'I see the dentist twice a year... once for each tooth!'

'With proper flossing there's no reason for hens to not have teeth.'

' ... plus you need to floss better.'

Whats ticking away in YOUR filing system?

"Be creative...!"

'It's only fair to warn you that if you get the job there would be a lot of filing involved.'

Research and Development: Now, Never.

In - Out - Pending.

InIn by-products.

'Oddly, few archaeologist comment on the flossing habits of Easter Island inhabitants.'

"Who's the idiot who filed Phil under F?"

"That explains all the cavities."

I've refiled all your letters under L.

Sandy Floss

In one ear/Out the other.

Dive in Archive.

Things you forgot to tell me about getting older: "You're going to need bigger tooth floss."

'I got confused by the news system so filed everything under 'M' for miscellaneous!'

'I can't remember the title,but it was on a little white piece of paper.'

Document Filing in the Post-Literate Era.

'Grandma makes everything from scratch! Why don't you ever buy any scratch?'

"That's a misconception. The key to salvation is, and always has been, daily flossing."

"I'll take your word for it. You don't have to show me your used floss."

"Sorry, nature calls, I'll be back in five minutes: Suzie, you're in charge..."

Toupee in a tin.

"Brian's in the kitchen doing some blind baking."

Sandwich filing.

Steven Tyler's toothbrush.

"True, you have irreconcilable differences, but they're mainly about flossing."