Flood Preparedness Gifts

'After the first few floods our insurance company insisted we future-proof the house.'

'I'll be down in the basement.'

'It has less to do with loneliness than with the fact that I live in a flood-prone area and I can't swim.'

A female patient in an exam room sees a sign that reads, 'Break glass in case of physician burnout'

"Liable to flooding? Whatever gives you that idea sir?"

A Hole in the Dike

IRMA Hurricane Recovery in Cuba

Building Site - Life Jackets must be worn.

Emergency exit into Space

Department of No One Could Have Anticipated

"Siri, find an ICU near me."

"Hang on, I know I came into the kitchen for something..."

"I thought I was a hoarder, but it turns out I'm a prepper."

Wally flunks the test: The Emergency Broadcast System.

"What, no day spa? And you call this a luxury bunker."

'I'm building an ark because the polar ice caps are melting.'

"My God, now what?"

Venice Floods

"We'll cross that bridge when we come to it!"

Hiker Followed By Paramedic

Japan Disaster: Japanese fighting Nuclear Grim Reaper.

'Have you filed an environmental impact statement for this flood?'

'Thank you for waiting. Please continue to hold and your call will bee answered as soon as we can.'

"Maybe this is insignificant, what with everything going on in the world, but do we have a fire extinguisher?"

"We'll feel pretty silly if it's downgraded to a tropical storm."

Climate Change Contingency House

"....rather than spend millions on a potentially fruitless effort to avoid flooding we've decided to focus on public safety!"

"On the other hand, voting to fund disaster relief would violate my conservative principles."

In case of fire call yourself.

Chef: In Case of Emergency - can opener and canned food.

Goldfish Insurance: " We must insure against a deluge of BIBLICAL proportions. . ."

It's been awhile, so to refresh your memory - what you need in your car for winter snowstorms...

"But part of me hopes there never is an Armageddon."