Flirty Banter Pillows

"Sure, you're an elephant, but you're not at all elephantine."

An historic event in Candyland: When M met M

'I wouldn't kick her out of bed.'

'Telephone call for Mr. Right!'

...The origin of the word daisy is from Anglo Saxon 'Daes Eage,' literally meaning 'days eye' because daisies open at dawn.'

'Do you come here often?'

"Why, Mr. Conly, I do believe you're trying to get me hydrated."

'Have a drink while I slip into something comfortable.'

'Yeah, but this time she just said no -- there wasn't any hysterical laughter!'

"Wanna go out?"

Heart To Heart

'How many husbands have I had? Do you mean excluding my own?'

Edwina momentarily considered sarcasm. . .

'Fill 'er up!'

'Sweet, Caroline?'

'We were playing doctor until she hit me with a malpractice suit!'

"I guess you could say we're into each other."

'Gail, my dear, please don't talk about sex - my God this is a restaurant!'

'Did you hear about the fool who goes around saying no all the time?'

Weddings...

"Ever notice that you finish my sentences and. . ."

Ask Sadie. Dear Sadie, BOO! Did I scare you? Regards, Rick in Seattle. (Actual reader letter). Ask Sadie at asksadieshow@gmail.com. Yeah, I'm really scared. Aren't you, Rudy? Boo, Rudy! Boooooo! That, however, terrifies me. Sorry, you were saying? Some guy tweeted his breakfast menu.(This cartoon was originally published on 2014-07-07)

I need advice and if you ever tall anyone I asked, you're dead. Go ahead. People aren't taking me seriously. When I insult them, they don't seem that bothered. They don't cry or run away like they used to. C'mon, you're plenty offensive. Don't patronize me you @#$% meathead. Wow. Didn't bother me a bit.

"I felt the Earth Move!"

'I've been lucky with men - I haven't met any yet...'

"I'm missing a significant other person in my life."

Hello, sugar lumps? Oh, wrong number? May I call you sugar lumps anyway?

'No, sorry, I just work here.'

Brunette girlfriend " I quite like your beard. You are only half as ugly now."

'I don't think of you as a sex object, Irene -- I think of you as two sex objects!'

'My dad warned me about fellas like you!'

'You look like a strong man -- could you get the lid off this container of birth control pills?'

Aren't you going to invite me into chambers? I would, but I have a chambersmate.

'Yes I like your approach... Now let's see your departure!'

"I've always had a thing for women with big....hair!"