Flight Gifts

"We're airship people, not mega-airship people."

'You'd never get me up in one of those things!'

"He built his own airplane from a kit."

Caveman who has just invented the wheel is amazed to see a paper airplane demonstrating the principle of flight.

Caveman chipping out wheel, then trying to fly.

"If God had meant us to fly, he'd give us more leg room!"

It may work, but it's considered lazy and unprofessional.

Wings?! Don't jump the gun --- Let's get used to being bipedal first!

"I had that dream again where I was flying."

'...Excuse me...Whoops, my fault!..Sorry!..You first...Pardon Me...Sorry...S'cuse me...Look out!...Pardon'

Did you know that hawks can travel 250 miles without flapping? Big deal. So can I.

'So...Now I can get American's loudy service and U.S. airways inept baggage handling all in one convenient airline?'

Birds Following Witch.

The First Kite

'J.B. Potts, Head of Research, Aerodynamics...'

"You're going to die."

"Should've let go of the plane when I told you to."

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

"I was going to chuck it all and go to Paris but I didn't have enough frequent-flier miles."

"Hawaii, where are you folks going?"

"First class, or with children?"

'What zip code are we in now?'

Airlines

'Why don't you just pull over and let them pass already?!?'

'Some of those youngsters have come up with a terrific new idea - feathers.'

UK border controls relaxed.

"Here we are."

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

Servicemen.

Fighter Jet Sneeze

A newborn parachutes to safety after the stork carrying him gets hit by a plane.

Airline Debts: Layoffs to help us stay afloat.

'You just don't know when to give up, do you?'

'Yes, I do have some ideas for the wedding! We could fly in on jet packs, say our vows on a bridge over a piranha pool with you in a white bikini, hold the reception in a casino and honeymoon in a secret underground bunker!'

'Can our software do that?'